10: Life is sexually transmitted.
9: Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
8: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
7: Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
6: Some people are like a Slinky ... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
5: Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
4: All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
3: Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a substantial tax cut saves you $0.30?
2: In the '60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
1: We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America , but we haven't got a clue as to where terrorists (Osama) are located?!
